Come As you Are

Hello again, dear reader. As has become the common theme for this blog, having essentially become a public journal that chronicles the key events, moments and direction that my life has taken over the last decade, I am writing this quickly from a place of simple honesty and raw emotion. I thank you for taking the time to read, and for your love and support!

Come as you are…

The phrase echoes in my soul as I listen to Crowder sing those words… Lay down your shame… oh wander, come home… lay down your heart, come as you are… I am overwhelmed by the message, because I see this fantastic, sobering and beautifully heart-wrenching vision of a tall, slender man with his back to the God who created him and loves him so dearly, walking away through a tall field of reeds being choked by thorns. God stands by the road, always in sight, beckoning, calling with tear filled eyes as His child strays further and further from the path.

But does this heavenly father give up? With outstanding grace and unending mercy, He does not. He continually called, beckoned and placed among the thorns little signs that pointed back to the road, at the end of which stand two tall gates, the passage of which lead to heaven, eternal life, and eternal rest at the bosom of the Father. The child cries, screams, pushes away, tramples those signs at each and every turn, and it is clear he thinks he can continue through the harsh wilderness alone and find his own way. But finally, the weeds trip and bring him to his knees, and in complete abandonment of his own will, he turns and sees his Father with arms outstretched, beckoning. He struggles to his feet and pushes through the brush, fighting through the burdens that weigh down his feet and fight so dearly to see him fail and fall for the final time. But he knows then, His father loves him, wants him, is ready for him to come home.

He reaches his Father, this God who loves him so dearly, and collapses into His arms. The warmth of the embrace brings him peace, but also a crushing and breathtaking sorrow, and he weeps. Deep, gut wrenching sobs are let loose as the sheer weight of all his choices, the hurt he’s caused his Father and the people he loves nearly crushes him. The young man feels altogether unworthy, and in fact he knows that he is unworthy, but for the first time, he hears his Father whisper “But you are loved.”

I once thought that I needed to be perfect, clean or somehow have my life “in order” (whatever that is supposed to mean) in order to approach God. I learned, harshly and altogether because of my own choices, that I can never be “good enough” to approach my Father. I am human, my heart is nothing but wicked, and apart from Him, I can never be righteous. It was only by realizing, really knowing that to my core that I was able to let go, and let God take control of my life.

So wherever you are in life as you read this, I pray that God speaks to you as He has spoken to me, that He draws you to Himself. No matter the cost, whatever it takes. Whether you know just how wretched you are, or even if you think “but I’m not so bad” (yes, YOU ARE. You’re deceiving yourself if you believe that you can be good enough without God’s grace) – Your Creator is ready to hold you. Your life might and probably will still have troubles and be far from the perfect, cookie cutter design that you have planned for yourself, but you will have peace when you rest in the Father. He loves you. He is calling to you, right now, in this moment. Fall to your knees. Let yourself be humble before Him. Surrender, and find peace.

Copyright © 2022 D.M. Kurtz